Meet A MILSO Monday: Stefanie and Ray

Updated: Jan 27, 2021


Ray and I met in high school through mutual friends. I currently had a boyfriend so nothing was going to happen between us at the time. We became best friends our sophomore year, we did everything together. Our junior year, we started to lose touch and saw less and less of each other. During senior year, my boyfriend at the time and I broke up. Ray was there for me through it all and made sure I left the house to help get my mind off of the break up. One night we were with another friend of ours and I remember Ray asking me questions about if I ever dated a guy in the military how loyal would I be to him?

At the time, I was dead set on not dating someone in the military, mainly because I did not think I could handle if they were to get deployed and not knowing what was going on.

When I left for the college the following fall, our friendship began to dwindle yet again. He did continue to make the effort to see me when I came home for breaks. Finally the time came when he had to leave for boot camp. I drove home for a weekend so I could see him before he left. It was that weekend that one of our mutual friends and my sister finally convinced me that I did have feelings for Ray. Of course nothing happened at this time since he was leaving at the beginning of March and would be gone until June.

  When he finished boot camp, I saw him twice on his 10 days of being at home. It was one of those two days where, after much coaxing from the same friend and my sister, that I finally kissed him. Again, I didn’t think anything of this because he was leaving yet again and I knew his phone time was limited. He was headed back to California to finish up some stuff before he started his schooling in North Carolina. To my advantage, his schooling in North Carolina was backed up so he was able to come home for two weeks. I actually picked him up from the airport because I was one of few who knew he was coming home.


The first week he was home, he ignored or turned down each attempt of me asking him to hang out. Just as I was about to give up hope, he invited me over for a movie night. His last week of him being home consisted of us being together everyday. The final night Ray had, was the night that would change both of our lives. As I was saying my goodbyes to him, not knowing when I would see him again, he asked me to be his girlfriend. August 6th of 2014. Since the day we have started dating, I have seen Ray a total of about 3 months, all


I would be lying if I said long distance relationships are easy… but they are definitely worth it. Ray and I have had many ups and downs and times where we need each other, but it physically cannot happen. He is back out in California while I am finishing up my education in Iowa. We do the best we can and we both know when all is said and done, our military relationship is worth it. I wouldn’t change my Marine for anything.

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